The Struggle to Stay Present

I've written about the importance of "living in the present" before; and I'm sorry to tell you that neither that post - nor this one - is filled with particularly groundbreaking information.  (What can I say? I'm no Eckhart Tolle or Swami Satchidananda.)  Regardless, recently I've really been struggling with the idea of embracing the present moment.  Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I feel like I am living right on the periphery of life-altering change.  

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It's as if I am standing at the edge of the cliff, and I know that I have to jump.

I also know that I will land safely.

But the moment right before I leap...

...as I'm standing and looking over the cliff...

...is utterly terrifying.

The result is that I want to be anywhere, anywhere but there, on that cliff.

I just want to have jumped already.

I want to have already landed safely.

I want to skip over the actual act of jumping...

...the free fall...

...the terror of transitioning from one place of stability to another.

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As Bo and Lola and I finish up our last few weeks here in Jacksonville, FL, I feel the tides of change swirling around me.  And even though I feel that change coming, and I KNOW it is coming, it is also really crazy to think that everything from where we live, to who our friends are, to where we grocery shop, is about to change.

And this change is different in so many more ways than ever before.

I have never lived in the Pacific Time Zone before.

We will have real winters.

I will work...somewhere I'm sure...but, as of yet, I have no idea where.

We will live in the same house for three years.

I won't be this close to my family again for a long time.

God willing, we will start a family in this new home.

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For all of these reasons and more, I am having a hard time staying present, living in the here and the now, and embracing today.  I catch myself rushing ahead, wanting to skip over this time of "goodbye," and I find myself wanting to hurry through this time of transition just so that I can feel "settled" again.

I'm not sure, but maybe our best growth happens during times of transition.  Maybe personal growth requires you to feel a little unstable.  Maybe, when I am at my most uncomfortable, I have no other option than to "let go" and just "let it be."  And perhaps the greatest gift of all is learning that when I "let go" and just "let it be," happiness and joy are still mine.

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Maybe it's all as Swami Satchidananda has said:

[Life] is all just a carnival.  We meet people and sit with them on a carousel for a while.  Your neighbor might be sitting on a tiger, you might be sitting on a horse.  You say, "Hey, hello," and go around in a circle.  When the ride is over you get down, but he may continue.  Or he may get down and go somewhere else.  Just think of the whole [life] as a carnival." (Source)

Yes, life it just a carnival.

Get on.

Get off.

Get on.

Get off.

Be happy.

Be joyful.

Always. 

Question of the Day:

How do you stay present when things are about to change?  Any and ALL suggestions are welcome in the "Comment" section below!

Blessings,
Ally and Bo

The Golden Present

Young people live in the future.

Old people live in the past.

Wise people live in the present.

 - Anonymous

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I randomly stumbled upon this quote about five days ago. Ironically, I have thought about this quote quite a bit since then, which - I suppose - means that I am living a bit in the past.

Go figure.

I find that, most of the time, I am battling against my propensity to dwell on time gone by, or incessantly plan for those yet to come.  But - let's not get sidetracked - regardless of my own thought patterns, the quote above seems (to me, at least) to echo a great truth.

Living in the present moment can be hard.

For a multitude of various reasons, we might all want to escape our present.  Perhaps it is diverting to focus on the warm and fuzzy memories of your past.  Perhaps I find it calming to plan for things that won't yet happen for another six months (or, in some cases, six years).  Perhaps, by expending our energies on the past and the present we are momentarily set free from the things in the present moment that we might much prefer to ignore.  Perhaps, the past and the future are (at times) misused to distract us from the pain, the hurt, the anger, and the depression of the here and the now.

But, therefore, doesn't that also mean that we run the risk of missing the abundant joy, the surreal happiness, the holistic peace that is also the present?!

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In fact, one of the true sources of both happiness and health is the ability to inhabit the present moment...not just to exist in it, but to BE in it.  

For, as we all know, "reality only exists right now - it's as close and accessible as our breath - and this awareness heals suffering caused by past regrets or future fears."  As Eckhart Toole has said:

Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry - all forms of fear - are caused by too much future, and not enough presence.  Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are cause by too much past, and not enough presence. 

Remove the old garment which no longer suites you

and step bravely into the new one - 

weaved from an awareness

gained after years of struggle and pain.

Do not lose site of who you are

in that quiet space - where only reality exists.

You've paid a high price to get here - 

no sense in giving it all back.

Your life is here and now.

Be present for it.

Live it wisely.

Nirmala Devi 

(Source)

While at the ashram receiving my yoga teacher certification, I was gifted with Swami Satchidananda's book entitled "The Golden Present."  Filled with daily readings from Swamiji's lectures and talks, this books offers up a variety of teachings on how to serve others and realize peace, truth, and unity.  I read it almost every day (some day's I forget...oops!); and although I have a long way to go before learning its lessons, it has certainly been a helpful tool along the journey.

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I will leave you with today's excerpt from "The Golden Present":

August 19: The Simple and Practical Way to Find Peace

Anytime anyone complains of worry, anxiety, depression, fear, hatred, jealousy - whatever it is - let him sit back and analyze the cause.  If he is really sincere, he will find out that he wanted something for himself.  Selfish desire causes all the problems.  Do things for the sake of others, not for yourself.  That is the simple and practical way to find peace.

Question of the Day:

Do you feel like you live in the past, present, or future?  What can you do to help make you even more PRESENT in your own life?

Blessings,
Ally and Bo